Inspirational Quotes from Charlie Brooker

When you’re being earnest, people think you’re being sarcastic, and when you’re being sarcastic, they think you’re being earnest. The moral in all this, of course, is that people should never attempt to communicate.

Charlie Brooker

What’s odd about the selfie stick is that while it might faintly improve the photo you’ll post on Facebook, it definitely makes you seem like a shallow, awful clown to any bystanders in the humdrum physical space you’re posing in.

Charlie Brooker

If someone doesn’t respond to a phone call, I think they’ve died.

Charlie Brooker

A cupcake is just a muffin with clown puke topping.

Charlie Brooker

I’ve never lost that freelance mentality. You can’t take a holiday because you’re worried the work will dry up.

Charlie Brooker

Tinder is the ultimate gamification of romance. It’s ‘Pokemon Go’ for the heart.

Charlie Brooker

The sole purpose of a crown is to make anyone not wearing one feel like an insignificant pauper. They’re obscene to the point of satire.

Charlie Brooker

Is hacking ever acceptable? It depends on the motive.

Charlie Brooker

Nothing happens in cricket, ever. Even the highlights resemble a freeze frame.

Charlie Brooker

I like technology, but ‘Black Mirror’ is more what the consequences are, and it doesn’t tend to be about technology itself: it tends to be how we use or misuse it. We’ve not really thought through the consequences of it.

Charlie Brooker

The fashion industry is an immense cultural and social blight that only gets a free pass because its would-be detractors are scared it’ll start criticising their haircut.

Charlie Brooker

I didn’t pass my degree due to never handing in an acceptable dissertation, and while it didn’t harm me in the long run, my failure to complete the course properly probably led me to spend the next six years or so coasting, unsure of what to do next.

Charlie Brooker

Calling Batman ‘the Dark Knight’ is like calling Papa Smurf ‘the Blue Patriarch’:you’re not fooling anyone.

Charlie Brooker

My career path is like crazy paving – it goes all over the place.

Charlie Brooker

Short of finding a place on the witness protection programme, you don’t get many opportunities to completely reinvent your life. Going to university changes that. Away from home, away from parents, away from anyone who remembers you from school, you can pretend to be far cooler and more experienced than you are.

Charlie Brooker

New Year’s resolutions work like this: you think of something you enjoy doing and then resolve to stop doing it.

Charlie Brooker

We’re inseparable, games and I. If you cut me, I’d bleed pixels. Or blood. Probably blood, come to think of it.

Charlie Brooker

Getting a moral lecture from the fashion industry is like Jeffrey Dahmer criticising your diet.

Charlie Brooker

I can’t imagine painting my face in a team colour and roaring with delight as a multi-millionaire kicks a ball at a net.

Charlie Brooker

If you’re living in a dystopia, you don’t necessarily want to look at another one.

Charlie Brooker

Like bankers, top footballers are massively overpaid, but at least you comprehend what they’re doing for the money.

Charlie Brooker

I’m no financial expert. I scarcely know what a coin is. Ask me to explain what a credit default swap is, and I’ll emit an unbroken 10-minute ‘um’ through the clueless face of a broken puppet. You might as well ask a pantomime horse.

Charlie Brooker

I haven’t always been the kind of man who plays videogames. I used to be the kind of boy who played videogames.

Charlie Brooker

Games get a bad press compared with, say, opera – even though they’re obviously better, because no opera has ever compelled an audience member to collect a giant mushroom and jump across some clouds.

Charlie Brooker

It’s hard to think of a single human function that technology hasn’t somehow altered, apart perhaps from burping. That’s pretty much all we have left.

Charlie Brooker

We take miracles for granted on a daily basis.

Charlie Brooker

The Twilight Zone’ was sometimes shockingly cruel, far crueller than most TV drama today would dare to be.

Charlie Brooker

People tend to think I’m a lot more earnest than I am.

Charlie Brooker

At 16, I was drawing cartoons, and I wanted to carry on being a cartoonist.

Charlie Brooker

I can’t rank anything. I mean, how could anyone possibly say what their favourite piece of music is? I don’t have the ability or the desire to categorise things of that nature.

Charlie Brooker

I’ve scaled back my involvement with Twitter; it’s too easy to get dragged into an argument.

Charlie Brooker

I liked that sort of thing, those one-off stories like ‘Tales of the Unexpected,’ ‘Hammer House of Horror,’ ‘The Twilight Zone’ and ‘Alfred Hitchcock Presents.’

Charlie Brooker

I’m not anti-technology at all, really.

Charlie Brooker

Videogames are probably my first love.

Charlie Brooker

I liked ‘Making A Murderer,’ ‘Master of None.’ ‘Stranger Things’ I watched along with everyone else in the world. ‘Narcos,’ I really liked ‘Narcos’ a lot.

Charlie Brooker

I remember when I realised, as a child, ‘That stuff on the TV about nuclear bombs is real! Why isn’t everyone running around shouting ‘Aaarrgghh’? Why are people still buying bicycle clips?’

Charlie Brooker

I’m extremely neurotic; it’s the way my brain is built.

Charlie Brooker

I used to draw comics a lot. I was obsessed with ‘The Young Ones,’ and was massively into video games, although I was no good at them.

Charlie Brooker

I’ve got a phobia about throwing up.

Charlie Brooker

I don’t know how, at an age when you’re trying to put your identity together, how you cope with the pressure of a performance space, which is what social media is.

Charlie Brooker

I’m quite techy and gadgety.

Charlie Brooker

Technology is a tool that has allowed us to swipe around like an angry toddler.

Charlie Brooker

I’ve got no attention span.

Charlie Brooker

I wanna do some more goofy comedy stuff; I really enjoyed doing ‘A Touch of Cloth.’

Charlie Brooker

I’m looking forward to the ‘Twilight Zone’ from Jordan Peele… if anyone’s gonna reboot the ‘Twilight Zone,’ then there’s the man to do it.

Charlie Brooker

I loved ‘Get Out.’

Charlie Brooker

With ‘Hang the DJ,’ I was concerned that it was more comedic and much lighter than we normally do for ‘Black Mirror.’

Charlie Brooker

On ‘Black Mirror,’ we don’t tend to deal with big, powerful people, because when you look at a Weinstein or something, you think, ‘Is he capable of feeling anything?’

Charlie Brooker

The logical quandaries thrown up by well-meaning systems are clearly something that I find darkly amusing.

Charlie Brooker

I think the problem we have as apes is we’re asking far bigger questions than we could possibly process.

Charlie Brooker

In the age of social media, everyone’s a newspaper columnist, exaggerating what they think and feel.

Charlie Brooker

Brexit is a harbinger for Trump, really.

Charlie Brooker

In the age of social media, everyone’s a newspaper columnist, exaggerating what they think and feel.

Charlie Brooker

Brexit is a harbinger for Trump, really.

Charlie Brooker

Hopefully, some supervillain threat will come down, and we will have to unite as a species and fire our nukes into the sun or something.

Charlie Brooker

If there’s no point, then there’s no point giving up.

Charlie Brooker

People always assume I went to public school, which I didn’t, so that immediately puts me somewhere.

Charlie Brooker

All Pixar movies are heartbreaking, aren’t they?

Charlie Brooker

I have often felt the worlds of social media and the Internet are like a weird dreamscape. Even physically, when you are looking at your phone, you are out of it.

Charlie Brooker

When you meet people you’ve interacted with on social media, they are not like they are on social media.

Charlie Brooker

I’m scared about everything. I’m an anxious worrier. I worry about the downside of everything.

Charlie Brooker

I can quickly go to a place where I worry about society spiralling out of control.

Charlie Brooker

I do think that it’s a dysfunctional relationship between columnists and commentators, because they both seem to hate each other, like a terrible marriage.

Charlie Brooker

There’s so much stuff flying around online, and it’s so easy to get into arguments with people.

Charlie Brooker

When it comes to something like Brexit, I am part of the liberal-media London bubble, and so, to me, voting to leave was madness. My perspective was that it was cutting off your nose to spite your face.

Charlie Brooker

There are different groups of people in your life that you behave slightly differently with. You behave one way with your family. You behave in a different way with your work colleagues. You behave differently with your friends from the movie club, your fitness instructor – all subtly different personas.

Charlie Brooker

Online, you’re trying to appeal to everyone and people who you don’t know at the same time. So I think, as a side effect, it amplifies the desire for groupthink.

Charlie Brooker

I do worry about civil unrest, or complete collapse of society, or having to flee, or Europe falling into a war.

Charlie Brooker

I never really thought of myself as a TV critic. I was presenting TV before I was writing about it.

Charlie Brooker

People bemoan the loss of watercooler chat, but I think that there’s more of that than ever. It’s just that it’s online.

Charlie Brooker

The fashion industry is the worst possible vessel for conveying an ethical message about anything.

Charlie Brooker

Amplifying body-image issues, profiting from anxiety, and employing virtual slaves in sweatshops are bad enough, but the fashion industry is also actively hastening the destruction of the very Earth we walk on. It insists on launching fresh collections each season, declaring yesterday’s range obsolete on a whim.

Charlie Brooker

Our metropolises are blighted by two problems: a lack of public transport and a lack of public loos.

Charlie Brooker

My bookshelves chiefly function as a snapshot of what I was reading prior to the invention of the Kindle.

Charlie Brooker

MasterChef’ delivers all the reassuring, cadenced repetition of an endless chore without any of the bothersome elbow grease.

Charlie Brooker

‘MasterChef”s preliminary stages deliver just the right level of almost-drama for viewers feeling shagged out after a hard day’s fruitless existence.

Charlie Brooker

My brain knows best-before dates are a con; my panicky gut treats them like a nuclear countdown.

Charlie Brooker

It’s a remarkable pace of which things change and adapt, and it’s hard for us to keep up with as a species.

Charlie Brooker